I am a Shaws Card Holder

Do you go to Shaws Supermarket?

A lot of people do. In Boston, Shaws just might be the most popular supermarket around. Just about every neighborhood has one, and those neighborhoods that don’t have one, if there are any, probably want one.

When you are inside a Shaws, you can’t help but notice how clean and well laid out all of the aisles are, and how this makes things so easy to find. There is one exception, a certain dirty messy Shaws that I won’t bother to name here, but all of the others I have been to have been everything a supermarket could ever aspire to be.

The bottom line is: Shaws is where it’s at!

I don’t mean to brag or anything, but guess who is a VIP at Shaws?

Mayor Menino?

Maybe, but guess again. Stumped?

The answer is me. This afternoon I received my special Shaws card. Now, no matter which Shaws I go to, all I have to do is show them my premium membership card and I get all sorts of special deals. For example, most people would have to pay $.79 for a candy bar. Well, if I buy two of those candy bars, I get two more FOR FREE!

Now, I don’t think it’s necessary to abuse these privileges. After all, the reason I have this card is because I am a respectable person, and respectable people don’t go around buying 45 cases of Coca-cola just because they are half off through Sunday. Respectable people like myself, card members, know that there will always be a deal waiting for them at Shaws, and stocking up ridiculously on provisions like Coca-Cola is something for people who shop at BJ’s or Costco. There is a bond of trust between us and our supermarket, the knowledge that we will always, despite the looming threat of a nuclear armed Iran, be there for one another.

What was that? You say you would like to go shopping with me? Well now. This relationship is something you have to earn. You can’t just leech off a member in the same way you can’t just become a member. You have to establish a relationship with this institution that shows you possess those same attributes and virtues that Shaws required to become what it is today. Once they get to know you, they will give you a look, a look of familiarity possibly. Something that tells them you are worth investing in. And they will ask you, “Do you have a Shaws card?” And then you will ask them how to get one, and before you know it, trust will have VALUE!

Together, Shaws and you will forge ahead to a bright new future!

2 Responses to “I am a Shaws Card Holder”

  1. Dave says:

    Stop and Shop has better prices on just about everything.

  2. Wow, you got one too! They lied! Those SOBs told me I was the only one! Damn you Shaws!

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